The question now with each new Morrissey record is, "Just how bad is this one?" Much like the gamble concert-goers face when contemplating the purchase of Morrissey show tickets in the hopes he won't invariably cancel a bunch of dates, a new album from Moz raises the dilemma of just how much a listener wants their fond memories of early efforts from Moz and The Smiths to be tarnished by the latest one. I'm here to tell you that Make-Up is a Lie is bad. Even for the most devoted of fans, Make-Up is a Lie is a chore to get through.
Site contributor Stan Cierlitsky and I bonded over Smiths records just about 40 years ago. Working at a string of competing record stores, we both shared scoops about Morrissey's then new solo career. And here in 2026, we commiserated recently over just how god-awful the first two singles from this record were. "Make-Up is a Lie", braying nonsense, and "Notre-Dame", cowardly innuendo, are shit. And they are quite possibly two of the worst songs in the vast catalogue of Morrissey's solo career. A third single, "Amazona", is a less offensive Roxy Music cover which would have sounded better as a flip-side. "Boulevard" is lackluster Moz-isms, while "Headache" is almost workable, a not-too-horrible minor win here on Make-Up is a Lie.
Even the bright spots are caked in the kind of malaise which suggests that even Morrissey is sick of Morrissey. "Kerching Kerching" is almost workable, trodding similar ground as "Paint a Vulgar Picture", while "Many Icebergs Ago" is dark and brooding in a "I want to be Nick Cave"-kind of way. It's the one track here where it feels like Morrissey is at least making some kind of artistic stretch. Closer "The Monsters of Pig Alley" is not bad, even if it too sounds only as good as a modestly successful Moz B-side from earlier in this century. It's clearly the highlight here.
What pleasure is there in writing this review? I'll tell you what, it's probably less than actually listening to this record. I don't really take joy in writing a bad review of Make-Up is a Lie, especially since Morrssey's music pretty much saved my life as a young person. There are many of us who'd say the same thing, I'm sure. The grim realization that sweeps over me when I play this Morrissey record here in 2026 is that the artist who was once so loved that he inspired hugging stage-crashers is now likely to inspire nothing but groans and shrugs.
Make-Up is a Lie by Morrissey is out today via Sire/Warner Brothers.
[Photo: Sire/Warner Brothers]